george carlin politicians transcript
Transcribed part of speech begins at 10.33, 13 May 1999, National Press Club, Washington DC, USA. endobj And there you have it, a transcript of George Carlin's take on social media. If you vote, and you elect dishonest, incompetent people, and they get into office and screw everything up, well you are responsible for what they have done, YOU caused the problem, you voted them in, you have no right to complain. (LAUGHS). %%EOF I always thought it was kind of funny and someone out of character for a POLITICIAN to go out of his way to point out the low level of American intelligence (LAUGHS), when indeed his very job depends upon it. Now normally during peace times the politician would refer to people in the military as: POLITICIAN:OUR YOUNG MEN AND WOMEN STATIONED AROUND THE WORLD. So, the next time you're walking around looking at your phone, tweeting and Instagramming and Facebooking, just remember this: you're not living in the real world, you're living in the digital world. Shut the fuck up! And the greatest arrogance of all: save the planet. Look, I'm not against technology or communication. 183 21 George Carlin on Voting Transcript Now there's one thing you might have noticed i don't complain about: politicians. 203 0 obj Reading the text, it sounds like a reasonably serious essaywell, sort of. "Forget the politicians. Anthony Hopkins is a pantheist-Catholic-agnostic who believes strongly in God. He discusses political stance and also societal beliefs on the environment, and the Earth's resilience towards bombardment by pollution. George Carlin was an American stand-up comedian, actor, social critic and author. 2023. He was a frequent performer and guest host on The Tonight Show during the three-decade Johnny Carson era, and hosted the first episode of Saturday Night Live in 1975. You crowned us', by Toni Morrison - 1988, for Michael Gordon: '13 days ago my Dads big, beautiful, generous heart suddenly stopped beating', by Scott and Sarah Gordon - 2018, Tara Westover: 'Your avatar isn't real, it isn't terribly far from a lie', The Un-Instagrammable Self, Northeastern University - 2019, Tim Minchin: 'Being an artist requires massive reserves of self-belief', WAAPA - 2019, Atul Gawande: 'Curiosity and What Equality Really Means', UCLA Medical School - 2018, Abby Wambach: 'We are the wolves', Barnard College - 2018, Eric Idle: 'America is 300 million people all walking in the same direction, singing 'I Did It My Way'', Whitman College - 2013, Shirley Chisholm: ;America has gone to sleep', Greenfield High School - 1983, Joe Marler: 'Get back on the horse', Harlequins v Bath pre game interview - 2019, Ray Lewis : 'The greatest pain of my life is the reason I'm standing here today', 52 Cards -, Mel Jones: 'If she was Bradman on the field, she was definitely Keith Miller off the field', Betty Wilson's induction into Australian Cricket Hall of Fame - 2017, Jeff Thomson: 'Its all those people that help you as kids', Hall of Fame - 2016, Dan Angelucci: 'The Best (Best Man) Speech of all time', for Don and Katherine - 2019, Hallerman Sisters: 'Oh sister now we have to let you gooooo!' I do not own this video. Off-course no politician would admit to such a lowly station as working in Government. Its called the American Dream,because you have to be asleep to believe it. everybody complains about politicians. STANDS4 LLC, 2023. So, I know that a little later on this year youre gunna have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much [Bill Clinton v. Bob Dole]. Look them in the eye, shake their hand, and share your thoughts and feelings in person. He is widely regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comics; one newspaper called Carlin "the dean of counterculture comedians". You and I are not in the big club. I just wanna put this behind me and that's an expression we hear a lot these days in all walks of lives. e d u / e t d / 4 7 1)/Rect[72.0 131.7406 279.0264 143.4594]/StructParent 6/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> Well, where do people think these politicians come from? A clean place to live. Search. endstream But really, they're just regurgitating whatever they heard on cable news or read on some clickbait website. Read it first. This is what we have to offer. 0000015151 00000 n Been through all kinds of things worse than us. His satirical comments and relentless attacking a damaged system that unfairly trounced on the rights of its . Given the nature of our current Administration, I thought it timely to revisit what George said years ago (Back In Town HBO Special, 1996) about American politicians and the American people who elect them. Where are all the bright, honest, intelligent Americans ready to step in and save the nation and lead the way? George Carlin: In football, the object is for the quarterback, otherwise known as the field general, to be on target with his aerial assault, riddling the defense by . But the POLITICIANS, god bless them or something like that, they're are at their most entertaining when they're are in trouble. Well off-course not only is it possible its inevitable and thats when he's at his very best and that's when he trots out the really good stuff. 0000000716 00000 n <<76B7883B53B3B2110A00D082ECFCFC7F>]/Prev 777933>> THOU SHALT NOT TAKE THE NAME OF THE LORD THY GOD IN. Garbage ingarbage out. George Carlin was known for his insightful and humorous observations on modern society, including his thoughts on social media. He pretty much smashed the nail squarely on the head. You dont. Whatever happened WellWell he's about to find out! for Caitlin & Johnny - 2015, Korey Soderman (via Kyle): 'All our lives I have used my voice to help Korey express his thoughts, so today, like always, I will be my brothers voice' for Kyle and Jess - 2014, Bruce Springsteen: 'They're keepers of some of the most beautiful sonic architecture in rock and roll', Induction U2 into Rock Hall of Fame - 2005, Olivia Colman: 'Done that bit. endobj What's with all the selfies? Theres a nice campaign slogan for somebody: the public sucks, fuck hope. I dont vote. They own you. It's our undeniably superior (almost god-like) intelligence that made life difficult for us when we were children. Thank you. Because if its really just the fault of these politicians, then where are all the other bright people of conscience? A lot of that goes on: QUESTION:SENATOR, HAVE YOU SOLVED THAT PROBLEM?POLITICIAN:WELL, WE'RE MOVING FORWARD ON THAT. Most of the images you will find here are available for license or purchase. [/wptabs]. <>/MediaBox[0 0 612 792]/Parent 175 0 R/Resources<>/Font<>/ProcSet[/PDF/Text/ImageC]/XObject<>>>/Rotate 0/StructParents 0/Tabs/S/Type/Page>> The big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. The only difference is, when I get finished masturbating, Im gunna have a little something to show for it, folks.. That's the problem in this country too many people getting on with their lives. They dont care about you at all at all AT ALL. Everybody says they suck. 0000080920 00000 n Everybody's going to save something now. 9 minutes; 13,650 views; May 13, 1999 You enjoy yourselves. So maybe maybe MAYBE, its not the politicians who suck. So self-important. That doesnt help them. I'm tired of fucking Earth Day, I'm tired of these self-righteous environmentalists, these white, bourgeois liberals who think the only thing wrong with this country is there aren't enough bicycle paths. It's our undeniably superior (almost god-like) intelligence that made life difficult for us when we were children. Yeah the public sucks. [wptabtitle]Friends[/wptabtitle][wptabcontent][twitter-feed username=shoq mode=search id=323794037750513667][/wptabcontent] Carlin considered conservatives and Republicans the greedy, warmongering class in political ideologies. Please validate my existence. Everybody says they suck. Well where do people think these politicians come from? Tired of that shit. Did you ever think about the arithmetic? Theres a reason for this, theres a reason education SUCKS, and its the same reason it will never, ever, EVER be fixed. I'm getting tired of that shit. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. George Carlin: Life Is Worth Losing - English Transcript. So let me tell you something. Then youre just what theyre looking for. That's a friend. People post pictures of themselves and their lives, trying to create a narrative that they're happy, successful, and popular. These people on social media, they're not your friends. I know, they say, they say: well if you dont vote you have no right to complain. New episode of the podcast is terrific. 189 0 obj And besides, all of these sites, they're just an illusion. https://www.scripts.com/writer/george_carlin/6024. 0000008961 00000 n ', Defense of 2nd Spanish Republic - 1936, Jimmy Reid: 'A rat race is for rats. Thats right. George Carlin Discusses 'Silly Putty and Napalm' Aired June 08, 2001 - 21:00 ET. Then, as the controversy continues to heat up, he moves to his next level of complaint: POLITICIAN:THE WHOLE THING HAS BEEN BLOWN OUT OF PROPORTION. These are the websites where people go to express themselves, right? If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people and they get into office and screw everything up, well, you are responsible for what they have done. Personally, I think we still need to hoist our fannies perpendicular and hike ourselves to the ballet box for all elections. There's a whole world out there waiting for you, and it's much more interesting than anything you'll find on social media.". Likethe public. But here's the thing, folks. Not in the abstract they don't. The politicians, the celebrities, and the lawyers, and although their level of insincerity is astonishing, it's still kinda fun to hear them talk. You caused the problem. endobj What a great idea. War, disease, death, destruction, hunger, filth, poverty, torture, crime, corruption, and the Ice Capades. No one has PROBLEMS anymore. 0000001412 00000 n (CLAPS, LAUGHS). His political commentary was scathing and on par with any of the greats, Pryor, Chappelle, Bruce. It's like we're all living in a never-ending episode of MTV Cribs. He said: Once you leave the womb, conservatives dont care about you until you reach military age. It would seem to fly in the face of that other rhetorical standby that: POLITICIAN:THE AMERICAN PEOPLE ARE LOT SMARTER THAN THEY ARE GIVEN CREDIT FOR. endobj Whenever the issue of term limits comes up, I always tell people the only term limits I'm interested in would be to limit some of the terms used by politicians. But, the Incomplete List highlights his exceptional understanding of, love for, and talent with language, sound, and rythmn. He was born May 12, 1937, in New York City into an Irish Catholic family, but he rejected the faith. However, most of his bile was reserved for conservatives and Republicans. Ill let Carlin tell you what he thinks. He is mostly non-political except for his involvement with the environmental organization, Greenpeace. They want more for themselves and less for everybody else, but Ill tell you what they dont want: They dont want a population of citizens capable of critical thinking. v. Pacifica Foundation, in which a 54 decision affirmed the government's power to regulate indecent material on the public airwaves. [wptabs style=wpui-mre-basic mode=horizontal background=false] Yeah, right. If you can afford a donation, it will help Speakola survive and prosper. 0000001596 00000 n Anyway enjoy it while it's h. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); All photographs on this website (unless otherwise indicated) were created by and are the property of Daniel R. Joder and may not be used for any purpose without permission. The late George Carlin was a genius with words, a deft dasher of conventional logic, and a master observer (and master-baiter!) And not that you can help it, I mean the problem is really with the people you cover. They are irrelevant. Were fucked. 4 0 obj They are us', Address to Parliament following Christchurch massacre - 2019, Dolores Ibrruri: "No Pasarn!, They shall not pass! Something is wrong here. Now you can just hide behind a screen and fire off your misspelled, grammatically incorrect rants to thousands of strangers. If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) People are so quick to judge and attack each other over the smallest things. Its hard to say if he was a Republican or a Democrat, however, as he refused to vote, considering it pointless because voting, as he said, is the illusion of choice.[4]. We're so obsessed with ourselves and our own little worlds that we can't even have a real conversation or a meaningful interaction with someone without checking our phones every five minutes. Its almost a poetic rap. Cause Americans have a lot of trouble dealing with reality. Updated on May 30, 2018. Where you calling from today? Forget the politicians. They want it back so they can give it to their criminal friends on Wall Street, and you know something? WHEN THE HEARINGS HAVE CONCLUDED, I WILL MAKE A JUDGMENT OR I MIGHT MAKE AN ASSESSMENT. Marc Allan: Oh, okay, good. The planet has been through a lot worse than us. Well where do people think these politicians come from? As for me, Ill be home on that day, doing essentially the same thing as you. Clearly he's preparing us for something (LAUGHS). THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. Famous Quotes by George Carlin about Politics. endobj Difference. (LAUGHS). But here's the thing: social media isn't real life. He said: [There was] a lot of classroom freedomin fact there was so much freedom that by eighth grade, many of us had lost the faith. You, and I, are not in the big club. They made questioners out of us and they really didnt have any answers. I dont vote. m o n t c l a i r . On Election Day, I stay home. ), Stay up to date with the latest Digital Ants Network (DAN) versions in our channel, All of these features are available at no cost to you. That's why we need people who can make the TOUGH DECISIONS. It's like we're living in this weird dystopian future where everyone is constantly monitoring each other, waiting for the opportunity to pounce. All day long beating you over the head with their media telling you what to believe, what to think and what to buy. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and reflections on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. Two hundred years versus four and a half billion. I say that where the military is concern the extent of a POLITICIANS insincerity can be measured by how far around the world our soldiers are stationed and whether or not any of them(POLITICIANS) can pronounce it? Fuck em. Im sure as soon as the election is over, your country will improve immediately. (Yes, I know, the USS America is a humongous, gargantuan behemoth, and the rudder very, very, very small, but we can still make it sloooowly turn to a certain general heading if we all pile our [intelligent] votes in the wheelhouse. Now hes on the side of law and order, jiu jitsu really: POLITICIAN:WE'RE TRYING TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS SO WE CAN GET THE FACTS OUT TO THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. The fact that Americans will probably remain willfully ignorant of the big red, white and blue dick thats being jammed up their assholes everyday, because the owners of this country know the truth. (LAUGHS) And we know this must be true because the next thing we hear from him is: POLITICIAN:I JUST WANNA PUT THIS THING BEHIND ME AND GET ON WITH MY LIFE. Vodafone Ad. Do you? Good honest hard-working people continue, these are people of modest means, continue to elect these rich cock suckers who dont give a fuck about you.they dont give a fuck about you they dont give a FUCK about you. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents(digitalcommons@montclair.edu)/Rect[400.0562 72.3516 527.5898 82.8984]/StructParent 7/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> xref I dont vote. [5] And another one: Let's get started! We could see through the hypocracy and illogic of our parents and teachers, but because of our age and size we couldn't do anything about it. So, it may seem like stand-up comedy, but I suspect Carlin is deadly serious. And secondly, I dont vote because I believe if you vote you have no right to complain. Are these fucking people kidding me? That's the problem." "Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out." " Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity ." "Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups." 186 0 obj And nobody seems to notice. So, that I can continue my work in Government. 0000003516 00000 n Fuck hope!. They're a digital petting zoo. Oh boy. They're not your friends. An INITIATIVE is an idea that isn't going anywhere! Your email address will not be published. Besides, there is nothing wrong with the planet. And we've only been engaged in heavy industry for a little over two hundred years. You don't. You have no choice. George Carlin on why he likes disasters and people under pressure, and why the planet is doin' just fine. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents()/Rect[72.0 612.5547 302.8926 625.4453]/StructParent 3/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> Before his death in June 2008, comedian George Carlin spent 10 years working on a memoir, Last Words, with his longtime friend Tony Hendra. Everybodys at the mall scratching his ass, picking his nose, taking out his credit card out of a fannie-pack, and buying a pair of sneakers with lights in them. Sure, here's a transcript of George Carlin talking about social media: "Social media, huh? Update this biography People like to twist that around. 188 0 obj Unless we think of some way to fight back. And the problem is, we're comparing our real lives to other people's highlight reels. I dont always agree with everything he says, but I always listen. I mean, why do we need to see some idiot eating Tide pods or jumping off a roof into a pool? POLITICIAN:THERE IS NO EVIDENCE, NO ONE HAS PROVEN ANYTHING EVENTUALLY I'LL BE EXONERATED. And American English is loaded with euphemisms. Michael Cooney was a speechwriter for @, George Carlin: 'Politicians don't actually say things, they INDICATE them', National Press Club - 1999. http://www.ravendevelopers.com/blog/2013/0 Bernie Sanders: 'So the next time you hear me attacked as a socialist, remember this', Georgetown University - 2015, Jimmy Carter: 'The threat is nearly invisible in ordinary ways. "George Carlin" Scripts.com. You know, that thing that's supposed to make us more connected and informed, but really just turns us into a bunch of self-obsessed, attention-seeking, validation-craving zombies. 192 0 obj The more we pointed out the foolishness of our "superiors," the more they kept us down. Im talking about the real owners now, the BIG owners! Obedient workers, people who are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork. 4 Mar. George Carlin was an outspoken comic, known for his brash sense of humor, foul language and controversial views on politics, religion and other sensitive subjects. 0000004120 00000 n And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shitty jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now theyre coming for your Social Security money. Very relevant for these times of high public paranoia about Global Warming! Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features. . I think the list of commandments was deliberately and artificially inflated to get it up to ten. Here's a transcript of a segment where he talks about it: "Social media, what a crock of shit that is. 0000003901 00000 n Add in a bit of effective protest and it might even turn a bit faster.). It's like the Wild West of the internet, but with more trolls. They speak of course with great caution, because they must take care not to actually say anything. Carlin considered conservatives and Republicans the greedy, warmongering class in political ideologies. He said: Once you leave the womb, conservatives don't care about you until you reach military age. George Carlin Politicians : Choosing Life or Death in Capitalist America.. George Carlin Politicians youtu.be. And of course, they're all looking for that dopamine hit of getting likes and comments from people who agree with them. Because at the end of the day, social media is just a bunch of zeros and ones floating around in cyberspace. Been here four and a half billion years. See they dont READ they REVIEW, they dont have OPINIONS they take POSITIONS, and they dont give ADVISE they make RECOMMENDATIONS. They're your 'likes'. Everybody complains about politicians. So my advice is this: put down your phone, go outside, and actually live your life. American stand-up comedian George Carlin is notable for his long-standing popularity from the early 60s up until his death in 2008. But wheres the logic in that? A friend is someone you can count on. The game is rigged and nobody seems to notice. Thats what the owners count on. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. Youre just gunna wind up with a brand new bunch of selfish, ignorant Americans [leaders]. Here's a transcript of a segment where he talks about it: "Social media, what a crock of shit that is. Their own habitat. Nobody cares what you had for breakfast, or what your cat did, or what your opinion is on the latest political scandal. (But First, Answer Me This). And secondly, I dont vote cause I believe if you vote, you have no right to complain. this is my tribute and way of promoting George Carlin's work. Then you're just what they're looking for. Theyll get it all from you sooner or later cause they own this fucking place! The transcripts I could find always sucked. Maher was raised a Catholic (but has a Jewish mother). "Save the trees, save the bees, save the whales, save those snails." So put down your phone, step away from the computer, and go out into the world. 0000002011 00000 n We dont have people like that in this country. I'VE FAITH IN THE AMERICAN JUDICIAL SYSTEM. Another favorite distortion is Public Service. 0000002803 00000 n I mean, have you ever looked at people's Facebook or Instagram profiles? He often commented on contemporary political issues in the United States and satirized the excesses of American culture. In 2017, Rolling Stone magazine ranked him second (behind Richard Pryor) on its list of the 50 best stand-up comics of all time. Copyright 2017 iComedyTV.com. This is said with a straight face although it's obvious of course that the proposition is stated precisely backwards (LAUGHS). It's like, 'Hey, look at me, I'm having a good time. I don't like euphemisms, or euphemistic language. And don't get me started on the selfies. Two is all you need, folks. Funny, Humor, Beer. Well, if you ask me, it's more like the land of the self-obsessed and the home of the vain. Very relevant for these times of high public paranoia about Global Warming! Carlin is usually spot on. They dont fall out of the sky. Its a big club, and you aint in it! They don't pass through a membrane from "another reality". In 2008, he was posthumously awarded the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor. To avoid redundancy in the comments section, we kindly ask /u/arkreder to respond to this comment with the prompt you used to generate the output in this post, so that others may also try it out. As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money.[6]. The Secret News (News ticker sound effect), Type out all lyrics, even repeating song parts like the chorus, Lyrics should be broken down into individual lines. Marc Allan: Good, thanks for calling. From his 1992 (first ever LIVE) HBO TV special "Jammin' in New York", performed in from of 6,500 people at Madison Square Gardens. For added emotional impact sons and daughters can always be substituted for men and women and so I think we can sum this up. "Now, there's one thing you might have noticed I don't complain about: politicians. People are stupid because, well, people are stupid. 'Oh, I'm so exhausted from traveling all over Europe for the third time this year. So Ive made what i hope is a more readable version below, so this classic piece of polemical gold can be shared and understood more widely. They [Catholic teachers] would fall back on, Well, its a mystery.[2]. of American cultural paradoxes. But I'm sure they will still remove this. CHALLENGES! Carlin took a liberal stance on most things, but generally found politics and politicians corrupt and ridiculous. As a lifelong stand-up comedian, Carlin had a lot of opportunities to speak his mindand religion and politics were two of his favorite subjects. Apparently, his last ballot was cast in 1972for McGovern. Fuck em! Who in fact did not even leave the house on election-day, am in no way responsible for what these people have done, and have every RIGHT to complain as loud as I want, about the mess YOU created, that I had nothing to do with. And don't even get me started on Twitter. Everybodys at the mall, scratchin his ass, pickin his nose, takin his credit card out of his fanny pack and buyin a pair of sneakers with lights in them. Sure, here's a possible transcript of George Carlin talking about social media: "Let's talk about social media. Now theres one thing you mighta noticed I dont complain about: politicians. But a comedian has the ability to use their anger and intelligence to refocus and reconstruct their pain into entertainment. 0000003180 00000 n Pfft! I dont vote. George Carlin does not need my platitudes, but I will still proffer them. <>/Metadata 181 0 R/Outlines 136 0 R/Pages 174 0 R/StructTreeRoot 145 0 R/Type/Catalog/ViewerPreferences<>>> ], Your email address will not be published. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( M o n t c l a i r S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y \n D i g i t a l C o m m o n s)/Rect[466.2109 650.625 540.0 669.375]/StructParent 2/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> From people in all walks of life usually the person in question who has committed some unspeakable act. The PEOPLE are fucked. 194 0 obj Everybody complains about politicians. Something is definitely wrong. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers. e d u / e t d)/Rect[230.8867 233.3227 416.9463 245.0414]/StructParent 4/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> Hes right. D} 8 &L$` %pPyZnC*ss9Qm^-u~Y]5;D- p?Ds+A$%C"CXU@5M`mO=YK6l[f0xc5j D6C"NMUCDV#[7q&>O!WsDm~ |!=?H^wM $M:w085uk8OaP;,p|Jp@H0 O#NE\f&KXl1DHq0,>b4A !oPfcmxe5)l*1x,g FC[A9u71-tILKA n_B--jxQjB,=oINnh;> R# }bO 7?|`M S(5OdC0#K1EH-Llj[~y' c7ozi=w,PP&e~g$2! *@@Gh!'[G F.r *N-@LoX15XvGA4#Wb_"$,%%8@2% x\}_nK '!oF+$SW9E fX{]YTUOm9qhSO+_7L|*kqyHUwor}=qgw;WnrG7no8G*w6a2Uq K|CQWO_nT]}wbvASBT=tE.t6C}qC)onmg2uAWq|9xLSg
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